It Was Always This Way

Two neighbors like family. One mistake that could ruin everything.

Neighbors Julia Herrick and Lindsay Moore have enjoyed a decade of joint vacations, family dinners, and holiday parties with their two families practically melding into one. So when Lindsay off-handedly announces the Moores are moving in a week’s time for her job, Julia is shocked and devastated. A mess of emotions, she turns to Lindsay’s husband, Denny, for comfort. But as reassuring touches turn to gentle caresses, Julia can’t tell if her feelings for Denny are real or merely a desperate attempt to distract herself from the pain of losing her best friend.

Denny can’t understand why Lindsay suddenly wants to move from the idyllic development where they’ve raised their kids, alongside the Herrick kids, for the past decade. With his marriage already on the verge of collapse, their impending move becomes the tipping point for Denny to act on his illicit feelings towards Julia. But what happens if she returns his affections? Are they both willing to give up the lives they’ve known (and thought they loved) to take a chance on each other? Because no matter how it turns out, no one will escape the aftermath of their decisions.

Read it now by clicking your favorite retailer link below, or keep scrolling for a preview.

Amazon Kindle button

Chapter 1: Julia, July 2009

Julia’s short brown hair clung to her sweaty brow as she plunged her dull garden spade into the thin layer of soil around her mailbox. Hidden beneath the soil was a dense and never-ending mixture of clay and rocks. It was bad around the mailbox, but it was worse in some of the side beds around the front and back yards where boulders hid a few inches beneath the surface. She’d have to do her best to hide the state of the garden beds from her husband, James. He was already on edge about the numerous flaws and imperfections they’d found throughout the house and property since they’d moved in a few weeks prior.

Julia had taken inventory of her neighbors’ yards and flower beds on her walks around the neighborhood. She found the majority of houses had lush lawns and thriving floral arrangements. They’d either paid to have some of the rock and clay replaced with fertile soil, or most plants were able to adapt and thrive regardless of the rough terrain. She hoped it was the latter though she knew many homeowners in her new neighborhood could easily find the funds to transplant their half acre of yard.

Julia had been skeptical the first time James had driven her through Scarlet Oaks Knoll to look at the house. She’d never been able to afford anything outside of a townhouse in what her mother referred to as the “somewhat dodgy part of town.” And there was James taking her through what appeared to be the set of The Stepford Wives minus the docile wives with perfectly coifed hair – at least from what she could see at that moment.

Her skepticism eased when they pulled into the faded driveway of the largest house in the development. The gleaming white for-sale sign was the only redeeming aspect of the foreclosed and forgotten relic in front of them.

The first time she took the kids on a walk around their new neighborhood she came upon three women adorned in matching Under Armor yoga pants and sports bras who were getting impressively deep with their quad stretches in the front yard of a house on Larkely Lane. The tall brunette in the middle caught Julia’s eye as Julia walked by the woman’s driveway. The Amazonian woman asserted her dominance by maintaining eye-contact while loudly discussing Julia’s family without any regard to who may hear her. She nodded her head towards the Herrick family and said, “The new family that moved into Monica’s house. Not much of an upgrade there. Let’s hope they can keep up with the mortgage so we won’t have another embarrassing foreclosure in the development.”

The slightly smaller blonde lowered her voice and cautioned, “We’re on the board now, Laura; we’re supposed to be welcoming the new neighbors.” She plastered on her best smile and waved to Julia and the kids. Alexis paused her balancing act on the curb and proudly waved back while Julia ignored the petit blonde in order to continue her stare-down with Laura.

The third woman, almost identical to the second in appearance, added, “I can’t believe we were ever friends with Monica. Did you all sign up for the wine-tasting fundraiser at the library yet? I want to make sure we all end up at the same table.” Like that the two blondes had written off the Herrick family as they continued to drone on about their upcoming social calendar full of PTO events and fundraisers.

Julia, the product of a local uppity private high school thanks to a full merit scholarship, made a mental note to steer clear of Larkley Lane on future walks. She’d survived high school by laying low and keeping a tight social group of just two other girls. Though more than a decade had passed since her school-girl years, avoidance still appeared to be her best option. Those types of girls, women now, played dirty and she didn’t have it in her to fight back. She looked away from Laura first, her head turned to the other side of the street in an effort to hide the scarlet-hued shame spreading across her lightly freckled cheeks.

So there she was, weeks later, still haunted by their comments and busting her ass to bring the house up to neighborhood standards. Julia threw a few more pulled weeds into a nearby bucket before wiping the sweat from her brow again and making her way to the porch for her wine – a Moscato, her favorite. Her youngest, Brice, was eleven months old and he had mercifully stopped breastfeeding on his own. She could drink and eat whatever she wanted without worrying about passing toxins on to one of the kids. Including her other child, Alexis, she’d been pregnant or breastfeeding for the past five years. The guilt-free indulgence of a sweet wine while the kids entertained themselves in the little pen she’d set up in the shade from the willow was like heaven on Earth.

As she sat on the front steps and sipped her lukewarm wine, Julia noticed a white minivan parked on the other side of the road. A man and a woman sat in the front seat talking. The couple, she assumed they were a couple based on their body language, would frequently pause mid-conversation and then glance towards her. Crap. They’re probably going to fine us for not painting our shutters to match our door, Julia fretted. She was about to call for James to come out when the driver and passenger emerged revealing two small kids of their own strapped into the backseat: a girl about the same age as Alexis and another little girl that looked just a tad bit smaller than Brice. But then Brice was giant for his age, so it was hard to compare other babies or toddlers to him to gauge age.

“Hi,” the woman called out as she checked for cars before making her way over to Julia. The woman was wearing cut-off jean shorts and a light pink tank top. If she was the mother of the baby, she had already lost every ounce of her baby weight. She had long blonde hair pulled back into a stylish ponytail with some of her hair twisted and wrapped around the hair tie to hide it. Julia searched her memory for who this woman was. They had just moved into the area and had met different neighbors almost daily. She panicked as she tried to come up with a name for this woman she couldn’t remember meeting. That happened a lot with Julia, she was terrible at placing names and faces.

“Hi,” Julia responded with a bit of caution.

“Am I interrupting?” the woman asked as she motioned towards Julia’s dirty gloved hands and sweaty outfit.

Julia’s cheeks reddened as she took in the stark contrast of her disheveled self against the well-groomed family that was materializing, seemingly from nowhere. “No. We haven’t gotten around to hiring a gardener yet, so I’m pulling a few weeds myself while the kids get some fresh air,” Julia answered as she pointed to the bucket of pulled weeds sitting off to the side. “For every five weeds I pull out I get a pull of wine. Should probably be drinking water on a hot day like today, but it’s not nearly as rewarding.”

She and James had no intentions of hiring a gardener. But that’s the effect the neighborhood was having on her. She felt on guard at all times to say the right thing and not draw too much attention to herself or her family. To not look too poor.

“No judgment here. I have a bottle waiting for me at home.” The woman’s husband had been tasked with wrangling the kids from their car seats. After a slight issue with a tangled strap, he approached the women with the toddler on his right and the littlest one in his arms. “I’m Lindsay, this is my husband Denny, and our daughters Liv and Hailey.” Denny, a tall, lean man in his late twenties, maybe early thirties, with a full head of dark brown hair, and Liv, a small girl with pink bows in her curly blonde hair, waved as Lindsay introduced them. Hailey absently smacked Denny’s face with her chubby little hands while blowing raspberries towards no one in particular. “We did a walk-through yesterday at 725,” Lindsay pointed to Julia’s neighbor’s house which had been on the market for a few days, “and we stopped by again today to get one more look at the house from the outside. We saw you here and couldn’t help but get out and hopefully ask you a few questions. Do you have time to chat?”

Julia was positively giddy at the idea of the picture-perfect family standing before her moving in next door. Her current neighbor had three teenage boys who smoked cigarettes (and sometimes weed) on the side of the house and played loud music as they sped out of the driveway. This young family would be a welcome and much-needed change.

“Sure. Do you want to come in for a drink? We have some toys and things for the kids to play with while we talk. Don’t worry, everything is already baby-proofed.”

“That would be amazing. It’s so hot outside and the kids are sick of driving around and looking at houses. They’d love to have a little playdate with other kids. Well, Liv would. Hailey’s too young to care one way or the other.”

“I’m Julia Herrick. My husband, James, is inside somewhere and my two littles here are Alexis and Brice.” Julia walked over to the pen to let Alexis out and pick up Brice to head inside. “How old are your kids?” Julia asked as she held the door open for everyone to enter the house. “They look about the same age as mine.”

“They do,” Denny agreed, grinning ear to ear. “Liv will be four in November and Hailey will be one next month.”

“Get out! Alexis just turned four and Brice turns one next month, too. His birthday’s August fifteenth. When’s Hailey’s?”

“August twelfth,” Lindsay said. “How cute. Just a few days apart. Denny, we have to buy that house.” Lindsay was holding Denny’s one free hand in both of hers as she pleaded with both her words and her stunning blue eyes. “Look at our kids playing.” Alexis had taken Liv’s hand and walked her over to the living room to show Liv her stuffed animal collection.

Julia put a hand over her heart and said, “That’s the sweetest thing ever. Yes, please move in next door.” As if they’d been friends for years, Julia and Denny both set the babies in the playpen set up in the living room. As she returned to the kitchen to get a wine glass she continued, “Our kids will be best friends; our youngest kids could get married,” Julia gushed. Denny and Lindsay each took a seat at the island.

Hearing muffled, unfamiliar voices, James entered the kitchen from the garage with a slight look of apprehension, and said, “Who is our not-even-one-year-old going to marry?” He had a stockier build than Denny though it was all muscle. His dirty-blonde hair was cut in a neat crew cut and he wore a white T-shirt with jeans and a tool belt around his waist.

Julia began introductions: “This is Lindsay and Denny…”

“Moore,” Denny added.

“Moore. They’re interested in buying the Smiths’ house. Look how cute our kids are; they already play so well together.” James looked over at the kids in the living room. The two youngest were merely co-existing in the pen while the older ones each had a doll and had their backs turned away from each other to play independently.

“Mmmm,” James gave in a noncommittal agreement. “Cute.” He turned back to the Moores. “I’m James, nice to meet you. Please excuse my appearance. I’m trying to fix all of the colossal mistakes the previous owners here made.”

Julia cut in before James could tear down their house again, something he was apt to do ever since they moved in. “Denny, do you want a glass of wine? We also have beer.”

“No, thanks. I’m good.”

Assuming she wanted some, Julia poured Lindsay a glass of wine. Since it was clear their company was staying a while, James went to the sink to wash carpenter’s glue off his hands before taking a seat at the island next to Denny. Julia could tell he wasn’t pleased to have unexpected company in the house while they were in the middle of so many home improvement projects, but he also believed in good manners. Despite the show he was putting on for their company, she needed to brace herself for the argument they would have as soon as the Moores left.

“Thank you,” Lindsay said as she received her glass of wine from Julia. “So, tell me all about the neighborhood. Where is Alexis going for Pre-K?”

An hour later the women had exchanged numbers and Julia walked the Moores back out to their car. She’d been so excited at the idea of new neighbors she’d forgotten about James’s foul mood earlier. James had not forgotten. When she opened the door to go back inside, he was standing in the kitchen with his arms across his chest.

“You have got to be kidding me, Jules,” James said as soon as the front door was closed. His voice dripped with exhaustion, as if he’d been slowly losing energy the past hour trying to keep his annoyance in check. “Bringing complete strangers into the house for drinks and practically planning out our kids’ future with them? What were you thinking? Who knows if they’re even interested in buying the Smiths’ house? They may have been scoping out our house and our family. They could be leaders of a human trafficking ring and you had wine with them and exchanged numbers, birthdays, preschool information. Did you slip them our social security numbers, too, just for good measure?”

“Human trafficking? James, please. Not tonight. I need to start making dinner. I didn’t realize how late it is.” Julia put on an episode of Dora the Explorer for Alexis and Brice before washing her hands and pulling out various pans and ingredients.

“You don’t know what kind of people they are. I’m not trying to hurt your feelings, but you’re not good at reading people. In all honesty, you’re the worst I’ve ever seen.” Julia pointed to her chest and gave a mock look of surprise to James as if she hadn’t heard a version of his you-need-to-be-more-careful speech a dozen times already.

“I’m serious, Julia. You’re too trusting. Always believing the best in everyone. I know it helps you feel good to think the world isn’t a shitty and scary place, but it is. Regardless of whether or not you accept it.”

“Fine,” Julia conceded. “If this all goes to shit, feel free to shove it back in my face how you tried to warn me how hopelessly trusting and naïve I am. But don’t hold your breath. That was my new best friend who just left. And, contrary to your opinion, I’m an excellent judge of character. I married you, right?” She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and then turned to make her way back to the oven.

She stopped short when he grabbed her arm, turned her back to face him, and pulled her in for an embrace. He kept his arms around her waist and gave her a long look of concern. “I’m not trying to be a dick, and I’m sure they’re fine people who may or may not actually put an offer in on the house.” He paused to find the right words. “I’m worried about you. Remember how you latched onto Carla when we first moved into the townhouse? You were up all night dreaming up potential vacations and trips for our families. And then you were devastated when she moved away a few months later.” He tilted her chin up so she was looking at him. “I don’t want to see you get hurt again.”

Carla had lived across the street from their old house. Coincidentally, Julia first met Carla when Carla was out weeding with a glass of wine. They weren’t immediate best friends, but Julia was relieved to have a strong friendship in the neighborhood. It was lonely having no company outside of a husband and one or two small children. Having an adult nearby to talk and laugh with had saved her sanity on more than one occasion. While she may not have been devastated, per se, when Carla moved away, she did have some serious concerns about her mental health once her friend left.

“This isn’t like that,” Julia replied. “Lindsay is different; I can tell.”

Chapter 2: Julia, October 2019

Lindsay and Julia huddled together by the firepit which sat dead center on the property line separating their two yards. Just as Julia had predicted, the Moores had put an offer in on the house next door and they closed two months later in late September. By mid-October the women had convinced the men to build a patio and fire pit right in the middle of their two yards. It hadn’t been an intentional symbolic bond between the two families, though intentional or not that’s certainly what it was. The layout of their individual yards prevented each family from creating the seating area and fire pit that they both so desperately wanted. The only way to achieve the perfect setup was to combine yards. And why not? They had already started spending all their free time together and both families were committed to staying in their houses and school districts until the kids graduated.

The women had been right. There they were years later and nothing had changed. The women were in their usual spots at the fire pit lost in conversation again, this time talking about the annual Halloween party to be held at the Herrick’s. Always a crowd-pleasing event, the fall festivities included costume contests, games for the kids, and tons of fall-themed treats and drinks. The party began as a way to avoid trick-or-treating with small children. It was woefully painful waiting for them to toddle up each long walkway, the parents wincing as their kids took out a flower bed or two along the way. House after house they waited as their kids’ chubby toddler hands hovered over the candy bowls, their eyes locked in a trance as they gazed into the mass of brightly colored wrappers. Finally, no matter how many times they reminded the kids to say, “thank you” and, “please,” the kids forgot and needed additional prompting at every single house.

Not to mention the influx of crowds from other neighborhoods and developments who flocked to Scarlet Oaks Knoll for the ultimate trick-or-treat experience. There was Harlow Street with decorations and displays that gave professional haunted houses a run for their money. A few dozen houses, mostly on Larkely Lane, were renowned for giving away the coveted king-sized candy bars. And to top it off, there were half a dozen or so neighbors who always set up at the ends of their driveways with freshly made s’mores (over a make-shift fire pit right on the asphalt driveway) and fall-themed adult beverages in shiny red plastic cups.

After their first Halloween together, Lindsay suggested they host a party for the kids rather than deal with the hassle of trick-or-treating. They could set out bowls of candy in the basement for the kids, and the adults would be free to actually enjoy their night as well without worrying about which kids were wandering off or running into traffic.

This Halloween was Julia and Lindsay’s tenth year hosting, so the ladies had big plans for the event. As per Moore and Herrick tradition, they’d arranged to have matching couple outfits per their preselected theme: famous couples. Lindsay and Denny would be decked out in all denim, à la Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake circa 2001, while Julia and James would be dressed in medieval garments as Macbeth and Lady Macbeth.

The two women had decided on famous couples in history months prior, but they clashed when it came to identifying which couples they classified as famous and relevant. Lindsay was annoyed Julia’s couple costume was of a fictional couple, while Julia couldn’t fathom why Lindsay would go as a couple who never even got married and ended in disaster. Not that Lady Macbeth’s suicide and Macbeth’s untimely death soon after was a happy ending for her couple either, but the Macbeths as a couple stood the test of time. People will still be reading and analyzing Macbeth and Lady Macbeth’s relationship for centuries to come. Surely everyone will have moved on and forgotten about Britney and Justin once a few more decades have passed.

Julia and Lindsay’s party planning was put on pause for a few minutes when Lindsay went into the basement to get them drinks of water. They had already had two glasses of wine and they didn’t want to get too tipsy the night before the party. Julia looked over at the husbands. They were up on the deck; both of them leaning on the railing and looking out into the smattering of backyards in the development.

She couldn’t hear what they were saying above the soft music Lindsay was playing on the speakers, but she could still see their faces in the little bit of light left in the sky. James was talking and looking off into the distance somewhere while Denny was staring right at her. She had expected him to turn away when she caught him – something he frequently did. But he didn’t. And because he didn’t turn away, she didn’t either. At first she was curious about why he’d suddenly allowed himself to stare her down so publicly – while standing next to her husband, no less. But her curiosity was replaced with sympathy when she noticed the hint of morose that touched every part of his face. It was subtle, but now that she could really get a good look at him, she saw how utterly depressed he looked.

Had it been different circumstances she would have said something to Lindsay about it, or James, or even Denny himself. But she knew Lindsay would dismiss it as his typical writer’s brooding, and James would have said she was over-thinking it and it wasn’t her business anyway. Approaching Denny about it was out of the question, too. They didn’t have that sort of relationship. For years she’d tried to be friendly with him only to find his answers short and dismissive. She was Lindsay’s friend, not his.

Lindsay returned with two ice waters for them and turned to shout up at the men, “Guys, come down for a minute so we can go over a few things before tomorrow.” She took her seat again next to Julia and they sat in comfortable silence while the men made their way down the deck steps and out to the fire pit.

Denny spoke as they walked, “You’ve been planning this party for almost a decade. What’s left to discuss?” It was a fair question. Julia herself wasn’t sure what Lindsay was talking about. She too thought they would simply repeat everything from the year before. The women had been discussing plans for a slightly more elaborate version of previous parties to make it distinct as the tenth annual, but all the basics of what they would do was already covered.

When they reached the fire pit, each husband dutifully took the empty seat next to his wife. The women shared a seat resembling a wooden love seat. They’d found it at a flea market and split the cost fifty-fifty like the modern couple they were. They also worked together to sand and refinish the piece of furniture to its present glory. For years it had been their seat with chairs set up on each side for their husbands. Denny leaned back into his Adirondack chair while James was at full attention in his seat with his elbows on his knees and his eyes set on Lindsay. Julia let her eyes settle on Denny again, but he wouldn’t return her gaze this time. She looked away, sure that she had imagined their previous connection. Had imagined seeing the sadness in his expression.

“Complacency is the work of the devil,” Lindsay chastised. She took a long drink of her water before continuing. “I’d like to do a surprise party for Liv’s fourteenth birthday, and I think the Halloween party is the perfect opportunity.” Julia’s eyes darted over to Denny who was shaking his head with what appeared to be disbelief or annoyance. “It’sthe only way to surprise her. Her birthday is too close to Halloween to have a separate, early party, and if we try to do it after her official birthday it will look like we forgot. She’d be devastated.”

Julia gave her response with a bit more enthusiasm than necessary in a pathetic effort to help quell the tension she felt rising between Denny and Lindsay. “A surprise party! How fun! I’ve never been a part of planning one that worked. It’s fine with us. Right, James?”

James did not share her excitement. “It’s the night before the party. You couldn’t have decided this any sooner?”

Julia’s eyes narrowed at him. “It’s fine. What did you have in mind, Linds?”

“I’m not sure, yet. I started toying with the idea this morning. I don’t want it to look last-minute.”

Denny eyed up Lindsay as he spoke, “Is that even possible since it is a last-minute birthday party? This is us, in the eleventh hour, trying to coordinate a surprise party that will coincide with an already planned annual party. It will be an obvious, last-minute failure.” Denny rubbed the stubble scattered across his chin and stared into the fire as if looking for answers, or in an attempt to avoid meeting eyes with anyone else.

James was a big proponent of not airing dirty laundry in front of the neighbors or even in front of his own family. What happened in the house, stayed in the house. Public disagreements or arguments like Lindsay and Denny’s tiff at the fire pit was, according to James, inappropriate and it made everyone else uncomfortable. Julia didn’t disagree with the latter. She wasn’t sure if she should comment anymore on the subject or if doing so would automatically put her on one of the sides of the escalating disagreement. She didn’t want to take anyone’s side. She only wanted to help Liv, who often felt like a second daughter to her, celebrate her fourteenth birthday.

Lindsay took a deep breath to push down any argument with Denny that had been about to come out. “I already contacted some of Liv’s school friends and invited them to the party as well. I figured you all wouldn’t mind, and I needed to move on this quickly since the party is tomorrow night.”

“Right, good idea.” Julia agreed. The party was usually for selected houses in the development, but they had a decent-sized house and there was plenty of room and food for more people.

“And we don’t usually have cake,” Lindsay added, “but I thought this year we could. I ordered a special birthday Halloween cake from Sugar, Sugar, the new bakery off of Elm.”

Julia nodded, “I’ve been wanting to try their desserts.” She thought for a minute then added, “We can set up a birthday photo booth station in the basement or even out here by the fire pit for the kids to do selfies. Also, Liv’s been begging to take control of the music, so we can let her be the DJ this year – with some guidelines, of course.”

“Perfect! See, I knew you guys would come up with some stuff!” Life sailed back into Lindsay and she was once again her confident and unbeatable self while Denny stayed lounged back in his chair and lost in his thoughts. James accepted his defeat from the women and stayed silent. It was hard to tell if he cared one way or the other.

“Wait, I haven’t gotten a gift yet,” Julia admitted. “I usually have it by now and am just waiting for her birthday, but she’s getting older and it’s harder to shop for her. I hadn’t gotten around to getting anything yet.”

“That’s okay,” Lindsay said. “We can both go to the stores tomorrow while picking up our other party supplies. I’ll help you find something; she gave me a few ideas of what she wants.”

“Just tell them,” Denny said in a low voice to Lindsay.

“I think we’re good here,” Lindsay announced. “Jules, let’s meet out front tomorrow at ten. I can drive. Guys, you have the kids and most of the decorations tomorrow, right? Be careful not to mention anything to Liv or the other kids. It’s a surprise party and I really want to surprise her. I’ve never had a successful one either; someone always gives it away.”

“Wait,” James said before Lindsay could get to her feet. “We’re literally doing everything the same as last year: balloons, dance floor and karaoke in the basement, creepy decorations, and so on? Denny and I don’t need to do anything to help with the birthday part? That’s all you and Julia tomorrow, right?”

“Exactly. This was my last-minute idea, so I’ll take care of everything birthday-related tomorrow.”

Now it was Julia’s turn to stop Lindsay before she could get away. “But we’ll still do a birthday dinner or something for Liv on her actual birthday, right? We always have in the past and I don’t want her real birthday to pass without any presents or fanfare.”

Lindsay started to appear slightly annoyed at what a fuss everyone was making over her child’s birthday and how she wanted to celebrate it. “It’s fine, everyone. We will seamlessly combine the birthday and Halloween parties tomorrow, and we’ll make sure we do something extra special on the tenth, too. The girl will feel so loved and freaking special she won’t know what to do with herself. Okay?” She flicked off the gas to the fire pit and started to gather up cups and small bits of trash that had accumulated over the past few hours they’d been out there.

Denny glared at Lindsay while Lindsay refused to look his way or acknowledge him in the slightest. Whatever was happening between the two of them, Julia hoped they would get over it before the party. Add a bit more booze (which flowed notoriously plentiful at the Halloween party) to whatever tension was rising between them and there would surely be a very public blowout.

Lindsay walked in front of Denny’s chair on her way back to the house and he thrust his arm in front of her waist blocking her path. She must have been half expecting it because she didn’t flinch or even turn to look at him. “Don’t,” she hissed. “We’ll talk when we’re inside.”

Julia didn’t mean to gawk, but she’d never seen the two behave like that before and she couldn’t tear her eyes away from it. James, immune as always, began walking back to the house. It was none of his business whatever was happening between the neighbors and he did not want to get caught in the middle of it.

Denny withdrew his arm and Lindsay again began to make her way from the fire pit to the house. Denny caught eyes with Julia. Before, she could have sworn they were full of sadness. At that moment, she could see they were full of animosity and anger. For a split-second, Julia tried to imagine what she may have done to cause his anger. Then Denny casually announced, “There won’t be any birthday dinner on the tenth because we’re moving to South Carolina next week.”

Denny’s announcement stopped Lindsay in her tracks. She whipped her head around to Denny with such fury Julia half expected Denny’s head to explode from some sort of Jedi mindpowers. Unaffected by her glare, Denny continued to stare at the now extinguished fire pit.

Unable to escape, Lindsay turned to Julia with a softened expression. “I was going to tell you right after the Halloween party. I didn’t want to spoil anyone’s fun,” Lindsay said to Julia.

“You’re leaving?” Julia’s tone was incredulous, so it came out more as an accusation than an actual question.

“I got an offer to be the store manager in Bluffton, South Carolina. It’s right outside of Hilton Head. I couldn’t turn it down.”

“You’re already a store manager. It’s a lateral move. You hate the south. Why wouldn’t you turn it down?” Julia demanded.

“That’s what I’ve been saying,” Denny added.

James had probably heard the beginning of the conversation, but he never stopped walking. He had already been heading for the house when Denny said they were moving, and James continued walking until he was back in the house. Julia suspected he knew it was going to be a long, difficult night sorting through everything whether he heard the fight first-person or whether he heard it second-hand from his wife as soon as she went inside. He probably preferred the latter because at least that way he could have a beer or two before he had to pick up all the pieces that would inevitably be scattered that night.

Julia’s eyes widened and she raised her hands out to her sides, “How are you going to leave all of this as if it means nothing? And in one week? I just…I don’t understand.”

“It’s a great opportunity and it’s time,” Lindsay coolly responded.

Julia looked from Lindsay to Denny, and then back to Lindsay. There really wasn’t anything else to say. She shoved past Lindsay on her way to her house and didn’t look back. Like a hurt and angry girlfriend, she paused briefly at the door to allow Lindsay a chance to call out to her and to explain how it was all a misunderstanding. A chance to see Julia slipping away from her and to realize what a mistake she was making to leave her.

Julia’s heart ached when all she heard was Lindsay and Denny quietly making their way towards their own house. Much to James’s surprise and relief, Julia didn’t want to discuss anything that night. He had already made sure the kids were in bed by the time she walked into the house, ready to listen to all her complaints about Lindsay and how everything would be ruined. But there was none of that. Even more surprising was how she jumped him when he finally made his way to bed that night even though she hadn’t initiated sex in weeks, if not months.

Chapter 3: Denny September 2009

Denny couldn’t believe his luck. He was certain it was all some sort of mistake and the powers that be would realize Denny’s fortunes were too numerous. They’d swoop in and reign down on him with tragedy and destruction in order to even out the playing field; to push him back into miserable obscurity with the rest of the moderately satisfied crowds of people.

And yet, as he waited for the bottom to fall out on him, his luck continued to increase. Or maybe it wasn’t luck. He sometimes believed referring to success and positive outcomes as luck was too simplistic of an explanation given how many variables are involved with any given consequence in a person’s life. This was true with his writing success as well. He’d worked his ass off as an assistant manager at P & L’s Grocery while staying up nights drafting out a science fiction novel he couldn’t get out of his head.

So many nights he’d considered scrapping the whole thing and forgetting he’d ever dared to dream of writing for a living. Months went by where he wasn’t able to write at all because he had been stuck on a plot hole or he’d convinced himself the whole thing was crap and unworthy of anyone’s precious time. Lindsay wouldn’t hear it, though. She had been Denny’s first and only beta reader back then. She’d helped him navigate plot discrepancies and pointed out characters she’d classified as too unlikable. Whenever Lindsay read a new chapter or section of his work, she would first gush over all the parts she loved before carefully providing targeted feedback with the help of her hand-written notes which covered the four margins of each page.

Maybe he had been lucky to have Lindsay for his wife, or maybe it was his decision to pick her as his wife that was to blame for all of his good fortune. He’d struggled in high school to write an essay about whether fate or free will had led Oedipus to his demise. As an adult, he’d made little progress in picking one over the other when assigning blame for his own various failures and successes.

Over a year after he’d started writing his manuscript, he’d finally finished and was ready to send out queries in order to land a literary agent. Most never responded. The one who did finally respond had nothing but caustic criticism for his “poorly conceptualized worlds and limited grasp of the sci-fi genre as a whole.” He’d been devastated. Ready to trash the whole thing and apologize to Lindsay for having wasted so many nights on an unattainable dream. His lovely, endlessly supportive wife wouldn’t hear of it. Lindsay had insisted on lifting his spirits with the most mind-blowing blow job of his life.

While her benevolent gesture couldn’t undo the blow to Denny’s ego, it did help to build him back up from the fall. He reworked the query letter he had sent out and researched new agents to send it to. The rejections continued to trickle in while Lindsay did her best to help him bounce back each time.

After a year of reaching out to literary agents and publishers, he gave up on the traditional route of publishing and settled for what was commonly referred to as vanity publishing. Ideal circumstances in the literary world would have Denny getting a paycheck for his work. Vanity publishing required Denny to put up all the upfront costs associated with publishing and offered no help in the area of promoting or advertising his book.  It felt shameful to publish his own work and he refused to tell family or friends about it.

Regardless, he overcame his pride and they had celebrated with a bottle of cheap wine and takeout from his favorite Chinese restaurant the night his book arrived in the mail. When the bottle was kicked and the inevitable leftovers from dinner were packed away in their tiny, somewhat fickle refrigerator, they stayed up talking for hours speaking hypothetically about what they’d do with all the money once Denny became an international best-selling author.

Weeks went by and no one ordered Denny’s book. He’d made it available online through Amazon and convinced a local bookstore to carry it since he’d sold them a dozen units at just two dollars per book. Each morning he’d check his email hoping to see an order from Amazon; every few days he would call the bookstore to see if they had moved any of his books off of their Local Authors shelf.  

And then one day there was a sale from Amazon. He and Lindsay did a little dance in the post office parking lot after they’d shipped it out to someone in Lexington, Nebraska. Remarkably, a few days later he found another order in his inbox.

People were finding Denny’s book, miraculously, amid the thousands of other sci-fi books and best-sellers. With that little bit of encouragement, the two decided to spend Lindsay’s entire annual bonus, a little over a thousand dollars, on digital advertising for Denny’s book. They agreed to give one good push for an entire month just to see what would happen.

Sales increased exponentially. They quickly went through the case of books they’d ordered from the publishing company and had to order a second round of copies. Large brown boxes of Denny’s books filled their tiny living room and evenings were spent fulfilling orders and creating expense and profit spreadsheets in Excel.

Within a few months Denny’s book had a cult following complete with fan mail to the apartment he and Lindsay were renting. But his biggest victory came when one of the agents who had previously rejected him reached out with a series offer and a generous advancement.

Denny was able to quit his job and focus full-time on writing out the rest of the series. He had his dream job. They were able to afford night classes so Lindsay could work towards getting her MBA and start climbing the corporate ladder at her job. They had babies and started saving up for a house. His writing profits helped them begin to build up a down-payment, though at the time they still couldn’t afford the predicted mortgage that would come with the home they’d envisioned and built up in their minds over the years.

And then luck, or ambition combined with skill and ability, or maybe a combination of all of it, struck again when Lindsay was promoted at work. She had been the department manager of the paint department at Moyer’s, and she’d been told in order to move up to the next position of assistant store manager she would first need to get her degree in Master of Business Administration. Fate intervened when one of the district big-wigs had noticed Lindsay reading a textbook for an MBA class on her lunch break. When he heard she was taking classes towards her degree, he encouraged her to apply to the current opening and suggested a woman of her ability who was already on track to graduate would surely have a strong chance of getting the position.

The two found a sitter for Liv, and Denny took a very pregnant Lindsay out to a celebratory dinner at her favorite restaurant, The Gin Mill. It gave them anxiety to spend such an enormous amount of money on dinner, but Denny insisted they forget about their finances for the evening. Their date night often popped into Denny’s head when he was feeling nostalgic. It was as if everything in their life had fallen into place that night. Their journey, though years in the making already, was officially getting into the good stuff.

For their first night in their new house, the plan had been to get takeout and to eat at the island. They’d spend the night on the blowup mattresses, a makeshift camping trip for Liv, and then get an early start on painting in the morning. They didn’t want to move any furniture in until they’d painted, and they still had three weeks left on their apartment lease anyway.

That had been the tentative plan. But their neighbors, Julia and James Herrick, wouldn’t hear of it. They were outside enjoying the brisk fall weather with their kids when the Moores had pulled up to their new house. Julia and Lindsay started talking like old friends who hadn’t seen each other in ages, while Denny and James engaged in a little bit of small talk about the structure of the houses and the Scarlet Oaks Knoll Homeowners’ Association. Denny was taken aback when Julia insisted they all eat dinner together on the Herrick’s deck that evening. She said James was grilling up burgers and he could easily throw a few more on for them.

It was supposed to be their first night, as a family, in their new home. Denny imagined playing hide and seek with the kids and walking around making final decisions about paint colors with Lindsay. He’d assumed they would toast cheap champagne to their new house and new beginning. Lindsay must not have had those same visions. She enthusiastically accepted the invitation without consulting Denny. He’d gone along with it, of course, because Lindsay was excited. He would always do anything he could to make his sweet wife happy. She’d deserved it.

The annoyed vibe from James was not lost on him, though he wasn’t exactly sure where it was coming from. Denny couldn’t tell if James had already decided he was disinterested in anything to do with Denny, or if he just resented them invading their family time. Denny could understand that; he felt the same way. Regardless, James was able put it behind him and eventually seemed to enjoy the company and dinner overall.

After everyone was finished eating, the kids were let loose in the safety of the closed-off living room while the adults got to know each other a bit better on the porch.

The table was big enough for eight when seats were added to each end. Lindsay and Denny had sat on one side with Hailey between them and Liv on the end next to Lindsay. Similarly, Julia and James sat on the other side with Brice in a highchair between them and Alexis on the end next to Julia. Once the kids were gone, the women each moved over a seat to sit next to her husband; they shared a quick laugh at how they had done it naturally and at the same time. Already perfectly in sync with one another.

James got two beers for himself and Denny, and the rest of the bottle of wine for Julia and Lindsay. James handed Denny his third beer and asked him about his work.

“I’m a writer,” Denny replied with as much confidence as he could muster. For some reason he still felt like an imposter in the writing world. As if someone could and would arbitrarily decide all his work was, in fact, utter crap, and his sales would dry up instantly. He forced himself to elaborate since he knew what questions were coming next. “I’m three books into my five-book series, Time and Again. It’s science fiction about a man who discovers time travel and different universes.”

“His first book sold thousands of copies without a publisher. He did it all on his own,” Lindsay gushed as she squeezed his knee under the table.

“I have a publisher now,” Denny knew this probably meant little to anyone outside of the industry, but to him he was never a legit author until he was officially published by one of the big five publishing groups.

“I’ve never heard of it,” James commented casually. Even though his tone lacked any malice, Denny noticed Julia gave him a scolding look. But James hadn’t turned to see her and so the look faded without achieving its intended effect.

Denny brushed off the comment. Lindsay was his biggest fan and she would rave about his books all night if the present company allowed it. He didn’t know Julia and James very well yet, but he bet Julia would have politely listened all night, too, while James would have either steered the conversation in another direction or flat-out left the table with some excuse about checking on the kids.

“What about you?” Denny directed towards James in an effort to turn the conversation before James had the chance.

“I’m an attorney.”

Lindsay’s eyes widened so dramatically Denny noticed her reaction in his periphery even though he was focused on James.

“What kind of law do you practice?” Lindsay asked. Apparently, she was not only Denny’s biggest fan, but potentially James’s biggest fan as well.

“Family law,” James said without any hint at elaborating. Lindsay’s eyes shrunk down to their normal size and Denny was once again, in her eyes, likely the most successful of the group depending on how you looked at it.

“Family law,” Denny repeated. “That must be difficult. Emotionally. I bet you’ve heard some crazy stories.” He was always interested in hearing the sordid details of such cases. Not that he enjoyed hearing them; he was more interested in trying to capture the essence of the people involved and predicting how it may impact their lives later. He would sometimes use the basic details of news stories as background for characters to explain their motivations, fears, or goals in his novels.

“I don’t hear stories,” James clarified. “I listen to factual accounts of what are sometimes horrific, home-life situations.”

The whole table grew quiet with a sudden awkward pause in conversation. Denny considered apologizing for insulting James and or his profession, but he was starting to get the feeling it wouldn’t matter either way. James was the type to lay everything out like he sees it without regard to how it was taken by the person with whom he was speaking to. In the current situation, James felt the word “stories” was inappropriate, and so he let Denny know. It was nothing James would dwell on so Denny let it go, too.

Julia, the one Denny dubbed the peacekeeper of the house, said, “I was a dental assistant up until Alexis was born. I know, everyone makes that face when I tell them what I do.” Denny, though probably not Lindsay, immediately felt guilty for making a face at the thought of working with other people’s mouths all day long. “But I love it. My brother, Kaleb, is autistic and dentist visits were a nightmare when we were kids. Getting him to brush was difficult with the sensory aspects of brushing, so he frequently had issues with his teeth and needed to see the dentist a lot. One day we went in and there was a new assistant who had a daughter similar to Kaleb. She brought out a weighted blanket, which was a new theory at the time, along with special headphones to drown out the drill noises. It was still an absolute nightmare, but no longer to the point where it was unbearable. It always stuck with me how much of a difference she made and that maybe I could do the same. That and the light music in the background and chill atmosphere. I know it sounds crazy, but I fell in love with dental offices.”

Denny was fascinated by Julia’s career backstory and began to wonder if maybe a character loosely based on Julia would ever work in his sci-fi series. Lindsay looked for the corporate ladder climb. “Will you ever go to school to become a dentist?”

“I don’t think so. I don’t have a desire to be a dentist. I like assisting.”

“Really? I’m an assistant manager at Moyer’s now, but I’m on my way to district manager and beyond. It’s one of the reasons I love working there; so many different paths and possibilities to work my way up. Especially once I finish my MBA – just three more courses to go,” Lindsay said with zero fear of coming off as too arrogant or ambitious. Denny always admired that about Lindsay: her ability to fight to the death for what she wanted without worrying too much about how other people may interpret her actions.

If Julia felt slighted, she didn’t show it. She listened intently as Lindsay regaled them with stories from her work. And they were good stories, especially when Lindsay told them. That was another thing that had drawn Denny to Lindsay in the first place – her ability to captivate a crowd with her wit and personality.

That night Lindsay dazzled with a cluster of stories about appalling interactions she’d experienced while demonstrating their latest vacuum cleaner at the front of the store. She pre-empted it with a quick summary about how a bad egg salad at their recent Memorial Day potluck left the store short-handed during one of the busiest days of the year which was why she had been filling in in the flooring department.

“It’s fine; I’m not too good to do a few vacuum demonstrations – even though it was a sexist assignment only given to me because I work with a bunch of chauvinistic jerks and have a vagina which apparently makes me a professional when it comes to housework.

“Anyway…speaking of vagina, I’ll go into my first story. I know when I start with that it sounds dirty, but it actually involves a man with pure and good intentions. He was an older man looking for a new vacuum for his wife as a surprise birthday gift. Cute, right? But what wasn’t cute was his pronunciation of the vacuum manufacturer. The name is pronounced ruh-jee-nuh, with a hard e sound. And it’s spelled r-e-g-i-n-a. Like the name Gina. But he pronounced it ruh-jy-nuh with the hard i sound instead. When you say it quickly enough, which the customer did, it sounded like he was saying, ‘I really like your vagina model. It picks up everything!’”

The table erupted into laughter picturing a sweet old man commenting on Lindsay’s vagina in front of both customers and coworkers in the crowded hardware store. Denny still laughed even though it had happened months ago and he’d heard the stories a few times since.

Lindsay didn’t wait for them to stop laughing before she continued, “And he wasn’t quiet about it either. He yelled to be heard over the vacuum, and he yelled because he’s an older man and he probably didn’t even know he was yelling that loudly. But everyone around him heard it, so guess who has another nickname?”

She pointed to herself and drank another sip of wine before continuing with the not-so-sweet and innocent comments she received from the contractors. Creativity was not their strong suit, so each comment contained either the word “suck” or “blow” in reference to both the vacuum and Lindsay’s mouth.

It wasn’t funny to hear about Lindsay’s experiences being sexually harassed at work; Denny cringed to think of the terrible experiences Lindsay had at work as a female in a predominately male industry. He knew he only heard a few, select stories from her myriad experiences. If he was honest with himself, he knew he should ask her about it to make sure she was okay. Because he wasn’t sure how Lindsay actually felt about what occasionally happened at work. Based on her stories she always turned the joke back on them and walked away unscathed, but was anyone really that immune to harsh and unrelenting commentary?

For the time being they all laughed along with her as she expertly transformed her voice into that of a male contractor while periodically standing to act out their exact expressions and reactions to her comebacks. He’d ask her about it eventually, but not that night. There was too much good to focus on instead.

Later that night Denny and Lindsay turned on the gas fireplace and set up the air mattresses in the center of their empty living room. The adults laid on the outside acting as a barrier to keep the girls in the middle from rolling off and onto the floor in the middle of the night. As their beautiful little girls slept, they recounted the night with the neighbors and tried to figure out the intricacies and dynamics of their new friends.

“James is a bit of a downer, isn’t he?” Lindsay whispered to Denny. They both had their heads propped up on their elbows and their faces were aglow with the light coming from the fireplace.

Denny’s eyes narrowed as he tried to politely express his opinion on James. Were it a romantic comedy, James would be the aggressive, stubborn husband who was eventually abandoned by his sweet wife because his cold, negative heart was just too much for her warm, optimistic personality to take anymore. “Yeah, I’m not really sure how he and Julia fit together. She seems so perky and jovial, while he’s brooding and pessimistic.”

Lindsay nodded her agreement to Denny’s assessment. “Maybe his work makes him brooding and pessimistic.”

“Maybe. Do you think you and Julia will hit it off long term? So far you’re just drinking buddies given how much wine you’ve had each time you’ve hung out.”

He hadn’t meant to hurt Lindsay’s feelings with the question, but he could tell he did by her dropped head and serious consideration. “I don’t know. I hope so. I could use a few good female friends.”

“I know. You’ll find them here.” Denny oh so carefully leaned over Liv to meet Lindsay for a chaste kiss as she cautiously navigated over Hailey to meet him halfway. “Everything is going to change with us moving here. I can feel it,” he said.

Denny and Lindsay got little to no sleep that night. Sleeping on an air mattress on the floor with small children may have worked in their late teens or early twenties, but they were officially getting old in their early thirties. They ached in the morning and were exhausted, but it was still a glorious feeling to wake up in their cavernous new house.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *